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Monthly Archives: February 2011

Living Alive – part 3

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” ~ Harold Whitman. I saw this quote the other day and when I read it, it was as if the words jumped right off the page and embraced me. I admit that I find myself a lot of times in survival mode, feeling like life has tied me to the whipping post, going through the motions, just trying to make it through until the next break comes along. Yet, when I stop for a moment and allow the winds of purpose to fan the flames of who I am and what I am here for, I feel that life rise up inside me like a blazing inferno. It is then that I know without a doubt these are the things that make ME come alive. (part 3)

Writing. I love to write. To be able to take the thoughts that dance around in my mind, put them together on paper in some sort of order to make sense (well, maybe it doesn’t always make sense!). What joy that brings for me. It is probably one of the most selfish things I do because 9 times out of 10, I am writing for my shear satisfaction and release and no other reason. I don’t claim to be good at it or feel the need to be recognized, although I do admit it is refreshing when something I say touches the heart of another person.

Anything can spark the notion for me to put the pen to the paper: a song, an event, a situation or circumstance, a scripture, stress, joy, elation, sadness (being that I am such an emotionally driven person, any emotion for that matter!) my children, a guitar player, a church sign, a quote, a nudge in my spirit. I have numerous notebooks that span over many years where I have wrote things down. It’s interesting to go back through them and recall what was going on in my life at that certain point and reflect what I was feeling in my heart. Sometimes I think, “dang, I wrote that!? “ And then sometimes I think, where is the matches, we need to burn this evidence!

Writing for me can be as intense as a life or death matter. At times my mind is so full that I feel like a balloon with too much air. One more breath, and POP! There is a line in the song, “Breathe” by Anna Nalick -“2 AM and I’m still awake, writing a song. If I get it all down on paper, it’s no longer inside of me, threatening the life it belongs to.” Oh the moments that I can relate to that feeling as well as I can my own reflection in the mirror. The peace that comes when all the turmoil is splashed down in black and white before me, outside of me instead of on the inside screaming like a wild banshee. Sometimes the words will pour out like a flood, and other times it is as calm as a gentle rain on a hot summer day.

Many times scripture plays an important role in what I am trying to express. Matthew 4:4 says, “ Man does not live by bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.” I can definitely testify that when I’m feeling weak, discouraged, down and out in Beverly Hills, starving for “that something” to give me the strength I need, I can sit down with my thoughts, pair them together with scripture and I will walk away nourished and rejuvenated, as though I have eaten the best porterhouse steak that money could buy.

My biased friends who love me (I’m such a lucky girl!) tell me I should write a book. Actually I have been working on a very special one for 16 years. I’m not sure how much longer it will take to finish it, but hopefully, someday, it will be a priceless treasure to the person it is written for. When I read over the entries, I feel as alive as I possibly can be.

So there you go. These are the things that make my life worth living. That which I have found that I want to “go and do.” The venues in everyday life that give to it the zing to reach beyond the ordinary. The areas in which I thrive in and enjoy putting forth every ounce of effort and energy that I possibly can into. Take these things away from me, and I would rather not exist. I cannot boast in possessing great beauty, nor in being talented, I can’t sing or dance ( I can however cook and clean like nobody’s business, and I will beat you in a game of Galaga! 😉 ) but I do hope that when years have passed and I am the subject of people’s memories, that these are the things that will be said about me: She was a great mom, an awesome companion and the best friend one could hope for. It will be then that I know that I have lived “alive.”

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Posted by on February 10, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Living Alive…part 2

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” ~ Harold Whitman. I saw this quote the other day and when I read it, it was as if the words jumped right off the page and embraced me. I admit that I find myself a lot of times in survival mode, feeling like life has tied me to the whipping post, going through the motions, just trying to make it through until the next break comes along. Yet, when I stop for a moment and allow the winds of purpose to fan the flames of who I am and what I am here for, I feel that life rise up inside me like a blazing inferno and I know without a doubt it is these things that make ME come alive. (Part two)

Friendship. I love being a friend. In being a person in someone’s life they can count on. To laugh with them when they’re happy. To cry with them when they are sad. To listen when they need to talk. To bring a much-needed smile to their countenance when life has had its way with them. Someone to get together with for no reason at all except to enjoy each other’s company. True friendship has to be one of God’s greatest blessings, a reciprocal relationship. Proverbs 11:25 says, “Those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed.” If you be a friend, God will ensure that you will have a friend. Just as He will move upon your heart to perform a small, thoughtful deed for someone, He will also drop in the spirit of a friend that you yourself is in need of refreshing. He may even send a sweet little one to your office with a bag of Lindor milk chocolate truffles at the very moment you need them the most! (the friend and the chocolate 🙂 )

There is comfort and security in an aged friendship, excitement and anticipation in the spark of a new relationship, the gift of someone God put into your life for a season to add priceless memories that time cannot erase. One of my favorite quotes is, “A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart, and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words.” What a treasure to have someone you can share your innermost being with, who can know the good the bad and the ugly and still love you. Someone who will pick you up when you have fallen, who will hum the tune for you when your voice has been silenced by failure or dissappointment. Ecclesiastes 4 says, “Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.” Another quote says, “A life without friends is like the sky without a sun.” What a dreadful place to be, alone with no friends! I would rather be in Alaska in 10 feet of snow than to ever find myself in that situation!

Companionship is the best of all friendships. Oh the joy when your best friend is the one you love AND are in love with . The one who puts the tune in your melody, the skip in your stride, the beat in your heart. The person that makes everything enjoyable just because they are there with you. Who will stick with you through every season of your life, through the ups and downs, the victories and challenges, the sunny times and the darkest hours. The one in whom your favorite place is simply laying in their arms. Genesis 2:18 says, “God said, ‘It’s not good for the Man to be alone; I’ll make him a helper, a companion.” The Bible also speaks of our relationship with Jesus as that of a bridegroom and His bride. Relationship and companionship was God’s idea from the beginning and, well, that is one idea that I really like (I fearfully admit that there are some things He says in His word that doesn’t always settle well with me, you know, the whole loving your enemy and women being silent stuff, I tend to debate those with Him). I love to meet couples who have been together for 20, 30, 40+ years and watch them still get that sparkle in their eyes when they are speaking of each other. Their stories are far greater than the best romance novelist could ever pen.

To love and be loved in return, to share your life with someone, to watch them light up because you walked in the room, to hold their hand when your walking through Lowes, to sit beside them instead of in front of them in a resturant because you want to be closer, to have them reach over and put their hand on your back when you are standing in a crowd, to think of something they said days before and laugh out loud. All these little things bring such deep satisfaction to my heart. They make me feel like King David when he sang about running through a troop and scaling a wall. (2 Samuel 22 if you want to read it, it’s great!) If I could achieve some great accomplishment, win the Nobel Peace Prize, merit a Presidential Medal of Honor, or be voted the most successful domestic engineer of all times and be recognized world-wide, but I had to do it alone, well, I’d rather eat potted meat for the rest of my life! Ugh! It is the people that make my life full of vigor and excitement. Add my spice to it and wow, what a life. 🙂
Part three coming soon…

 
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Posted by on February 9, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Living Alive (part 1)

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” ~ Harold Whitman. I saw this quote the other day and when I read it, it was as if the words jumped right off the page and embraced me. I admit that I find myself a lot of times in survival mode, feeling like life has tied me to the whipping post, going through the motions, just trying to make it through until the next break comes along. Yet, when I stop for a moment and allow the winds of purpose to fan the flames of who I am and what I am here for, I feel that life rise up inside me like a blazing inferno. It is then that I know without a doubt these are the things that make ME come alive.

(part one)
Being a mother. This has to be the absolute greatest joy in my life along with being the most challenging task I have ever taken on. The responsibilities are exhausting yet the rewards are countless! Psalm 127:3 says, “Children are a gift from the LORD; they are a reward from him.” I have been blessed with 4 very unique ones, all with magnificent talent and winning personalities – and yes they are fully aware that their personality is inherited maternally :). Children who are full of vibrant potential, destined to be successful in whatever they choose to pursue in life. Children that are hardly ever still!

There are very few things in life that stay the same, this is the one role that will always be a definite; I’ll be a mother till the day I die. I can be exhausted mentally, physically and emotionally and yet still pull myself up out of bed each morning knowing that I am doing the most important thing that God made me for. Becoming a mother changed the type of person that I was. It has taught me how to be selfless, forgiving, humble and thoughtful. It requires me to possess compassion and empathy, along with wisdom and discernment. To be successful at it, I personally feel it demands a close relationship with God. I have done more praying in my life concerning my children and being the mom they need me to be than I have over any other topic. What a terrible predicament I would be in if I didn’t have help and guidance from the greatest parent ever!

It is amazing the satisfaction I feel in my heart when my children are thankful for something I have done, or when they are in distress and I am the one they call on. Words can’t express the pride that radiates when my 8 year old announces to the whole lunch table, “this is MY mom!” or the warmth that penetrates my innermost being when they wrap their arms around me just because they love me. Moments like these are priceless and will be the ones that come to my mind when I am old and not so gray (thanks to Clairol and Manic Panic I WILL be the old chick with cool hair!), laying on the beach, soaking up the sun and sipping on my cool refreshing adult beverage. A few weekends ago, I went and watched a local band perform. The guitar player was incredible to say the least. I don’t think I have ever seen someone play an instrument with such zeal. It wasn’t enough to just hear him, but you were drawn to watch him, to witness the passion he had for the music he was creating wash all over him. As I stood there, with every cell in my body standing at attention, I thought to myself, “being a mom makes me feel like that!” And I was refreshed, renewed and felt alive.

…this is going to be a long blog because I can tend to be very wordy when I am writing about certain things, therefore, it will be continued… Until we meet again ;o)

 
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Posted by on February 9, 2011 in Uncategorized